I remember one of my first days at the U of I at C-U meeting various members of our beloved Kappa Sigma fraternity. One of these members in particular was quiet, reserved and hibernating-bearlike. His name was Tom Mathews. Soon did I realize that this Tom fellow really
wasn't a Tom at all, but would go by his alter-ego, binge drinking alias Madden*pictured at right (yes, as in TurDuckin). Not only would Billy constantly expect Madden to utter the words, "BOOM!" every 10 mins. but with his resistance to it, it became a challenge.
As an offspring of John Madden himself and a female Moose, Madden continued his college career matching multiple feats that may have been legend worthy, among them:
-Beer Bonging an entire 40 oz. of Malt Liquor (Please comment if you know what type) while myself and my Dad were sleeping in my room on Dad's Day weekend and proceeding to puke it all up in about 48 seconds
-Co-man with myself an unheard of streak of 8-10 beer pong matches one at some random party where a kid looking like Dirk Nowitzki was there and the playing surface was a closet door
-Complete an hour and a half nap at a bar blaring Kiss FM music whilst in a banana costume
-Spit out puke chunks on a fellow Cubs Fan at a game after attempting to not throw up after returning with two beers in the 8th inning after they stop serving in the 7th (Also, after we were moved the 1st of 3 times)
These are the few of 100's and please feel free to comment with additional stories, out-of-body experiences, etc. For all you Gingers out there, I have met your king and I am not impressed....
2 comments:
I accept Madden's appointment as King of the Gingers....it's either him or Danny Bonaduce
I didn't know gingers could use computers...I thought the light from the monitor was too strong for their skin.
Post a Comment