HOT
Cut That Meat!
- With a win streak at 3 games is tied for the league-high of consecutive games won. Philip Rivers is doing his best Drew Brees impression in San Diego having thrown for 10 TD's this year (maybe he's gotta back up his shit talking...) and TO has given the Licki brothers a solid 4 TD's through 4 games. Hopefully Romo gives him the ball more than a third of the time (as they did on Sunday) or he'll be either riding pine voluntarily or he'll be the one throwing balls.....at Romo's woman.....Still, CTM needs to prove himself in Week 5's matchup against the Sleeper of the Week: Oral Rex and his upchuck of a team
DeadBolt
- The overall points leader had a monster week 4 taking down his Oralness although the single week 30-burger he could be grabbing from the week-high points has escaped him by the slimmest of hairs. Backed by the bold pickup of B-West over All Day he is steam rolling to another playoff berth (would be his third in three years) as long as Brian can get healthy (What else is new?) Chris Johnson is looking like the best keeper value in the entire draft. He faces the Jew next week and look for Housh, Giants D and McNabb to lead him to a victory and push him to 4-1
Supa Dupa Fupa
- Finally toppled from his steady perch above the other owner peasants, Soup was brought back down to Earth with his loss to the Meat. Nonetheless, you cannot ignore his strong opening to the season having the only chance to pull a Patriots and go undefeated during the season. The league's leading rusher, Burner Turner has been studly and over playing his draft position alongside Frankie Gore and another keeper-esque player in JStew kicking teams in the FUPA week in and week out. He has had arguably the most quality wins beating two other 3-1 teams and if his Texans offense can get clicking like they did last week he could be a force to be reckoned with.
Lois Must Die
- S-Jax is Back, or Lois hopes so with his 188 yd all purpose yard output on Sunday, the Linehan Army may turn from Has-Beens to Has-letts...AHhahahah. One owner is hoping he keeps it up so defenses can lay off of Torry, but with all the criticisms and low expectations from the commissioner, Lois could be the surprise team of the first 4 weeks. Scraping together victories by 4.6 and 2.8 his first two weeks, this team is lurking with Romo not quite playing up to his full potential yet, Boldin had been a touchdown machine until this (Danny, you may want to tell Rae to turn away...), but with starting RB's like Edge and Warrick Dunn this week, one has to wonder if S-Jax alone can keep up this run
not
All-Madden
- BOOM! And just like that a season can go up in smoke...Tom Brady has doomed Madden's rookie season to an 0-4 start. Already pulling off three trades, this owner is desperate for anything (seriously, offer him whatever you want) that he already dropped Selvin Young after owning him for one week. Many can point fingers on to where the collapse happened:
- Brady
- No, seriously, it was Brady
- Ryan Grant...eww
- Minny Defense
- David Akers
- Bernard Pollard
- Nick Kaczur
- Averaging just over 60 points a game, this owner needs a win like Straebel needs sunscreen at a Cub game and who knows what would have happened in week 3 if he could have scrounged up .08 points from Ryan Grant (.06 total) or Santonio Holmes (3.63); It is kind of hard to root for an underdog when he is starting two Denver RB's and two Philly WR's.....
Little K Ral
- The 2nd lowest total scoring output on the year has had a rough schedule to start the year as well facing three 3-1 teams. Braylon has been an absolute disappointment but still feels he can jam in the endzone when he scores his first TD in week 4. Are the Karalis brothers doomed for fantasy disappointment? The Pittsburgh offense needs to carry him with his trifecta of Heath, Hines and Ben. Should be a W next week though vs. his next opponent, who is........
Gimme My Razor Back
- Yes, the team is 2-2; Yes, Ronnie Brown did score 5 TD's in Week 4; and Yes, All Day is possibly the studliest running back in the NFL, but one only has to look at the man behind the curtain of this team......John "Ocho Stinko" Barney.....Ocho Cinco is pretty bad especially with Ryan Fitzy throwing the pigskin; Santana Moss and Jerricho Cotchery have way overperformed their talent level and the handcuff team of Fargas, Brown and DeAngelo may not be able to keep up a solid No. 2 RB option; Nonetheless, I fully expect All Day to be ridden by the Dinosaur to the playoffs just as he did the previous year with Tom....
Oral Rex
- Yes, I did it, I put myself in the Not as you all probably assumed I wouldn't. Oral Rex is a team in shambles. Marshawn Lynch is the beautiful rose petal on a hairy Italian Ass. Willis McGahee is going to be hurt all year; Torry Holt looks like Issac Bruce (but worse....); the Flex position is filled with feces of the likes of Amani Toomer, Michael "Hairy" (Don't click it) Bush; Oral Rex has some cogs in the wheel of a championship, but will have to overperform from here on out if he can enjoy the spoils of money and as Scooby Doo says.....Roral Rex
Take a Shit or Get off the Pot
Terrorist Fist Jabs
- After a strong two weeks, Team Shalom has gone on a two game skid after beating the two cupcake Karalis teams. Marion Barber is looking like the best RB in the league not named Peterson as long as he gets more than 8 carries.....? Cutler has carried his team as Joltin' Jay has done with most fantasy teams to this point with the Broncos looking like the race to 50 points Saints of last year; The younglings in Royal and Bowe are solid WR options and possible keepers if they can get some consistency, but will they win weeks; TubDale White will still be getting goal-line carries and Steve Smith should stay gun shy with his fists the rest of the year, but one has to wonder with all of these inconsistent players save Cutler and Barber, will this team succeed or tumble?
Ron Mexico Fan Club
- I know the hyperlinks are getting fewer, but I gave myself too much credit on this on got too detailed and have become lazy. LT looks like he is back and with Forte, this team could have the best RB tandem in the league.....and that's where it ends....Calvin Johnson had a massive start to the year and followed it with a Bobby Wade-like 4 rec. for 40 yds. in Week 3; Jake DelHomme and Matt Hasselbeck are manageable but won't win any weeks on their own; Dallas Clark is losing catches to A-Gonz and Peyton's WR butt buddies (Marvie Harrissayne); Slaton is another solid keeper candidate, but this team needs more out of the rest of the team to compete. Ron has faced two of the 3-1 teams and faces fellow 2-2 OHAB next week in a battle to get above .500
OHAB???????? Orton Hears a Boo
- OHAB has taken two weekly point high scores (his only two wins) making him the "Any Given Sunday" team so watch out and he was a Brett Favre start away from bumping up with the HOT's; Although a ginger, his draft picks seem to have panned out here and there....Addai seems to be heating up, but needs to legitimize his value; the best WR tandem in Fitz and B-Marsh looks sexy even on a Ginger team and if Lee Evans can do his best non-Lee Evans impression the flex will be just fine; One starts to worry if/when Reggie Bush will get hurt and when Ced Benson will take over for Chris Perry (which OHAB has already owned for about 8 hours) Will OHAB throw up a W after being upset by the younger K-Ral?
Sweep the Leg Johnny
- The Boston Cream Pie still is wishing that he had Tom Brady on his team even if he was injured; Randy Moss is bitching, Willie Parker is hurt, Aaron Rodgers is sodomizing Jennings now instead of Favre hitting up Driver, and Chris Henry is still suspended; The light at the end of the tunnel is Henry who can be a key WR if he comes back productive as he did for the Commish last year, Willie Parker will be back, Drew Brees is a god and Shockey does not have a sports hernia and will be back sooner.
It should be a barn-burner of a rest of the year and I hope to put out more stuff like this as it goes, good luck to all and WATCH YOUR BYE WEEKS.....
